


One Year Gone

by K_K_TiBal



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Amnesia, Angst with a Happy Ending, Car Accidents, Happy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-30
Updated: 2015-01-30
Packaged: 2018-03-09 16:43:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3257066
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/K_K_TiBal/pseuds/K_K_TiBal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel wakes up in a hospital with no memory of what's happened, why he's there, or who the man next to him is that claims to be his boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One Year Gone

**Author's Note:**

> A ficlet that I originally posted to tumblr. Thought I'd share it here, too :)

Everything hurt.

It was just darkness for a long time, and then everything hurt.

He took a few moments to steady his breathing before slowly cracking his eyes open to the blinding light, squinting like he was just learning how to open them again.

"Cas?"

He blinked slowly, as he tried to make sense of the word.

"Castiel? Oh thank God."

Castiel. Right. That was his name. How could he have forgotten that?

Turning his head, he caught sight of one of the most handsome men he’d ever had the honor of setting his eyes on. Worry and a small amount of relief was obvious on his features.

"Where—" he coughed, trying to relieve the dryness in his throat. "Where am I?"

The moment he’d spoken, the man had  immediately stood to hover near his side. “You’re at the hospital, Cas. You were in an accident. Remember?”

Castiel shook his head. The last thing he remembered was…actually, he couldn’t remember. He was a college student, he knew that. He was studying…English. Yes, he was an English major. Oh no, had he missed class? Professor Moseley was going to kill him. Though, if he had to be stuck in a hospital, having a handsome nurse to take care of him wasn’t the worst thing in the world.

The man looked down hesitantly gripped at the blanket on his bed. “God, Cas. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. I should have gotten my own ride home in that weather. I should have just—”

“What are you talking about?” Castiel frowned, suddenly realizing that this man must not be a nurse, and was actually acting like he knew him.

The man rubbed at his eyes miserably. “Your accident. You were picking me up from the airport and you—”

"No, I mean…who are you?"

 

All of the relief that had been present on the man’s face quickly vanished. 

"What do you mean? I’m Dean." 

Castiel let the name roll around in his head, but it wan’t making any connections. He didn’t know anyone named Dean. 

"I’m sorry. I don’t—I’d like to see my parents, please. If they’re here." He briefly looked around, but it didn’t seem like anyone else was here. Just a few doctors bustling outside the door. 

"Cas.  _Please_.” The man—Dean—leaned in closer, desperation in his eyes. “It’s me. Dean Winchester. We’ve been together for nine months. You gotta remember me.”

Castiel swallowed and tried to edge backwards, cautiously eyeing Dean. He was trying to understand, but he’d just woken up—apparently from an accident—and now a strange man was getting up in his personal space and it was making him a little nervous. 

"I’m sorry, you must be mistaking me for—"

"Don’t you dare," Dean shook his head emphatically and gripped at Castiel’s arm. "Don’t you  _dare_  say that to me. I know exactly who you are and you know  _me_.”

The beeping from the heart monitor slowly increased as Castiel tried to get his arm out of Dean’s grip. As much as he was sure the man wasn’t  _trying_  to hurt him, he was still scaring him. 

"Please let go," 

The monitor became louder, the time between the blips growing shorter and a wave of doctors and nurses came running into the room. 

_"Cas please!"_

_“_ Sir, I’m going to need you to calm down.”

Castiel’s arm was wrenched out of Dean’s grip, but it didn’t seem likely that he was going to leave willingly. 

Dean struggled against the arms pulling him back. “We’ve got a place together! You’re the only reason I’m still sane after my mom’s death! Cas, we worked too  _damn_  hard on us for you to just forget!”

Castiel looked back, eyes wide. He just seemed so desperate. 

The medical team was quickly making progress on getting Dean out of the room, but he was a fighter with a cause. 

"Cas, I need you to—"

"Sir  _please._ You’re distressing him.”

"I  _need_ you—”

The door slammed shut behind him, leaving a very confused Castiel alone in the room, searching for an answer he might not ever remember.

~

Everything hurt. 

He’d been told that something like this might happen; Cas  _had_ sustained a pretty bad head injury in the crash.

A memory or two. Maybe that entire day. But Dean had never in his worst nightmares thought that he’d forget  _him_. 

And damn did that hurt.

If what the doctors had told him was true (after giving him a very stern lecture about how unstable and confused Castiel was mentally, and how screaming and clutching at him had not been the best move in the world) then there had been enough damage to Cas’s temporal lobe to cause him to forget an entire year. 

Would he ever get his memory back?

Maybe. 

Dean had heard the unsaid “Doubtful.”

So much had happened that year and it was important that Castiel didn’t forget it. So much growth. So much progress. Every single step forward  that they had fought for had been violently yanked from under their feet. 

All because he had been too fucking impatient to see him. 

It was still going to be another few hours before Dean was allowed back in to see Cas, under oath to behave better this time. Dean pulled out his phone as he waited, going through his sent box and reading the messages from yesterday, wishing he could take them all back. 

**Hallelujah! Land sweet land! I’m never getting on another plane again. (7:45PM)**

_(Delete) **  
**_

_**Oh please. You have no room to talk. You can’t even swim. (7:50PM)** _

_(Delete)_

**Actually I was wondering if you just wanted to come get me? I can’t wait to see your face again :) (7:57PM)**

_(Delete)_

**Thanks, babe. Two weeks has been too long. (8:06PM)**

_(Delete)_

**Hey it just started pouring. Drive safe, okay? (8:29PM)**

_(Delete)_

**I’m by the car pick up, where are you? (8:45PM)**

_(Delete)_

**Are you coming or what? (9:02PM)**

_(Delete)_

**Cas? (9:11PM)**

_(Delete)_

**Please wake up. (2:34AM)**

_(Locked Message)_

~

Castiel took another long nap after his first draining ordeal with Dean. When he woke, a nurse gave him food and sympathetically explained to him what was going on. Dean was apparently his boyfriend, which Castiel had found odd seeing as he’d always vowed to come out to his parents before dating anyone, and he hadn’t done that yet.

That he could remember.  

It was hard to believe that he was missing an entire year. 

He looked up when the doctor walked back in.

"Castiel, Dean would like to come back in. He’s promised to behave himself, but I’ll tell him no if you want me to."

Castiel chewed on his lip before nodding. He’d already decided that he needed to talk to him again. His parents still hadn’t shown up for some reason, and the medical staff didn’t know much about his personal life aside from what was in his file. Dean was the one with all of the answers.

Within a few minutes, Castiel was watching as Dean hesitantly let himself in, eyes downcast like he was afraid he wasn’t welcome.

"So. You must be my… boyfriend."

Dean rubbed at the back of his neck awkwardly. “Yeah, that’s me.” He licked his lips and took another careful step forward. “I’m sorry about before. I wasn’t expecting—I just…wasn’t ready.”

Castiel shrugged halfheartedly. “Me neither. Do you want to sit down? I have some questions for you.” 

Dean made his way over to the chair next to the hospital bed. “Okay.”

"Why haven’t my parents visited?"

It probably wasn’t a good sign that Dean winced and looked over at him guiltily. “You uh, you don’t talk anymore.”

Castiel’s eyebrows knit together, and while he’d almost been expecting something like this, it still stung. 

"Why?"

"You told them." Dean shrugged. "Last year."

Oh. Well that explained it. Them reacting this way was one of the reasons that he’d waited so long in the first place. “Well,” he let out a long breath, “Fuck them.”

That managed to coax a small smile out of Dean. “That’s what you said last year, too.”

"Did I? Good."

The smile slowly slipped off of Dean’s face as they let more silence pass between the two of them. 

"So, the Doctors say that maybe if we talk about stuff…we can find some sort of trigger that can help." Dean swallowed and glanced down at his clasped hands. "You know. Get your memories back."

Castiel nodded slowly, but didn’t want to get Dean’s hopes up. He seemed like a nice enough person, and he hated that he was hurting him so much without knowing why. “We can try. Can we start with how we met? I’d like to hear that.”

A smile tugged at the corner of Dean’s lips as he launched into story after story. Dean was very animated in the way he spoke, using his hands to help move the story along. If all that Dean was saying was true, then they had been through a lot together in such a small amount of time. The day of the accident, Dean had been coming back from a Racing Expo where he had been doing a test run as a race car mechanic. He told him about how he’d always joked about Cas’s major going well with being a a race track.

Castiel frowned. “What does English have to do with that?”

Dean’s face fell. “You switched to Photography six months ago. You just started talking about how much happier you were capturing beauty wherever you found it.”

Castiel hummed and gestured for him to keep going. 

Five hours of listening to Dean talk until his voice started to crack, and still he remembered nothing. If felt like he  _should_ , like he should know exactly what it was, but everything was just out of reach. 

The sun had long since gone down, and Dean looked exhausted from all of the emotional turmoil he had just willingly put himself through, and he couldn’t help but feel guilty that there was nothing he could do about it. 

"I’m sorry." Castiel whispered. "You seem like an amazing person… but you’re still just a stranger to me. We can try again tomorrow if you’d like." 

Dean sagged backwards into his seat and nodded in defeat. After a few minutes, it seemed like he’d finally gone to sleep. Good. He deserved some good rest.

The food on the plate in front of him looked a little less appealing an hour after it had been given to him, but the nurse had made him promise to eat. He poked at it a little, glancing over at Dean every so often.

How was it possible for him to have seen this face so many times and not know who he was? It’s not like it was a forgettable face. 

The sandwich was a little on the sad side, but at least the pudding was decent. Castiel sighed when he surveyed the small slice of pie. He wasn’t really in the mood for pie right now, and he didn’t want to waste it. Maybe he should just wait and give it to Dean seeing as he loved pie about as much as he loved—

Castiel froze.

Dean had never told him that. 

"Dean.  _Dean!”_


End file.
